Today’s question is, “Does your past define you and affect your future?” Well, for those of us that have not had easy pasts, this can be a challenging question. But, I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t have to.

Most of us have been through things that affected us and even changed us, whether we wanted it to or not. And, as time passes by we may not even notice how much it changed and affected us.

For example… if a particular event had never happened in our lives, where would we be now? How would we be living? Would we be the same person we’ve become now?

I know for myself that there are some things that happened in my life that truly changed me, for better or worse. Some things made me better in certain ways, even from bad experiences.

But, I’ve learned from introspection during my self growth journey that some things affected me negatively. And, I’ve chosen to work on those things even though it isn’t always easy.

(There might be affiliate links in this blog post that I could receive a commission from. If so, I’ll only include those I feel are helpful to you!)

Does YOUR past define you?

Does your past define you, even though you know it shouldn’t? We may logically know that it doesn’t make sense to let our pasts determine who we are or how we see ourselves now, but that doesn’t make it easier not to.

Things affect us, and it takes time and work to undo the damage. But, the first thing I want you to do (because it helped me) is to figure out how you truly see yourself. Then, you can look at what could have caused you to view yourself that way.

But, you can’t half do this. For true change, you have to really do the work. And, be honest with yourself and let yourself feel what you need to.

It’s part of the healing process, and you don’t want to cheat yourself out of this wonderful possible transformation.

You have the opportunity to lift your confidence that you had lost, re-imagine your dreams, and bring great things into your life as you finally see that you deserve them.

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If you’re brave enough to do this work on yourself, brave enough to look at the past just long enough to heal the parts of you that it affected, you can re-define yourself as the person you were before those negative experiences or even better.

And, it is possible. I’ve done it, and so can you!

You are not a sum of your past and your past experiences. You are you – the same beautiful, loved, abundant, complete spirit that came here from a divine place to inhabit this body. And, all you have to do is find that spirit within you.

Don’t let your past affect your future

A lot of things may have happened, but don’t let your past affect your future.

Does your past define you? In some ways it shapes you, of course it does. We just have to make sure we aren’t now identifying with things that aren’t us.

And we need to make sure we aren’t letting our pasts determine our futures, because it doesn’t have to be that way.

If we constantly think about the past that wasn’t good and re-feel the bad feelings that came with those experiences, then it’s like we’re still there and still going through those things. And so, we will recreate similar things or not change things for the better even if we want to.

Do not waste one moment in regret, for to think feelingly of the mistakes of the past is to re-infect yourself.

– Neville Goddard

(I found the above quote on Overall Motivation’s blog post on Neville Goddard quotes. And for more quotes, I also have a blog post called My Favorite of All Self Growth Quotes by Rumi & Others.)

We might feel stuck in life and not know why, feeling like we have no power to change it, without realizing there’s a deeper reason for it all.

How did your past experiences affect you, and how are they still affecting you? (If it’s too traumatic, please consider seeing a professional as I am not one. Sometimes we need extra help with these things.)

Once you’ve determined this, you’re a big part of the way there! We can’t fix issues that we don’t realize are there, so this is step one. And now…

Realize that these experiences don’t say anything about who you are right now. Forgive yourself if necessary, and perhaps others so that you can move forward.

This present moment right now is what you really have and is where you really are. You can’t go back to the past and change things. (I know this truly sucks sometimes. Trust me, I know.) But…

What you can do is affect tomorrow with what you do in your “now”.

And, this gives you so much power! It’s truly empowering once you get this.

Focus on the present moment to change your life

The past may have weighed on you, even more than you knew. But when you realize that you have the power to change yourself at any time and this can change your life, it changes everything.

You may go from “victim of life” to one who sees themself with choices and opportunities. I’m not saying you were a victim of life, but many of us understandably feel this way when we’ve been handed bad deals in life. (Again, I’ve been there.)

So, don’t let your yesterdays affect your tomorrows. Don’t let them hold you back. Those were just learning experiences or unfortunate events, and they aren’t here in your “now”. (Of course if they still are you have to deal with that first.)

We all have times in our past that we’d like to go back and change, so we might dwell on them without even choosing to. But, all this will do is drag you down. And for nothing, because like I said you can’t do anything about the past – but you do have today and your future.

So will you waste your todays and the possibilities ahead, or will you work on healing things so that you can be in the present moment as much as possible? Because, the present moment is where your future lies.

And, it just takes practice. At first you might find it difficult to be present in the moment, but as time passes it gets easier.

And, you’ll find that peace is in the present moment!

Your self growth journey will bring you peace & happiness

All of this work that you do on your self growth journey is worth it, because it can bring you true peace and happiness.

As you clear all the junk away that’s holding you back, you grow and transform yourself and your life. You stop letting the past hold you back and affect you negatively. And, then you feel more free and are able to be more present, at peace, and happy.

A wonderful sense of peace can come from being present, because you aren’t dwelling on negative things from the past or things that weigh you down. And, it feels great!

You’ll find after a while that it seems unnecessary to not be present in the now, because you can’t change things or make a difference from anywhere else.

Except of course when you’re dipping into the past to heal yourself now. But, you don’t stay there for long. I, myself, find this to be the trick. It’s too easy to start going down a rabbit hole or overthinking the past until it drags us down. So, don’t do that!

Get what you need (if it’s a negative experience), and get out and back in the now. Remind yourself of your purpose if you have to.

With all of this, I’m just telling you what I have learned helps from personal experience. But, you might find little things that help too.

Just remember that the past doesn’t have to define who you are now or affect your present or future if you don’t want it to.

Each of your “now” moments and your nows to come are yours, so do with them what you want to.

But the way I see it is, why waste any of it? You have a certain amount of time left on this planet and you may as well put it to good use and enjoy it!

Knowing your value & believing in yourself

One last thing.

I want to make sure you’re knowing your value and worth, because it’s important.

When I was younger I didn’t know it, but I didn’t know how worthy or valuable I was. I thought I had confidence because I knew how to “look pretty” and things like that, but I didn’t really love or value myself.

It took me going on a self growth journey within to see that I was lacking something inside – self love, self value, and true confidence in myself.

And, I believe that certain experiences in life shaped me that way. But, I also now know that things like this can be changed. It took inner work and being real with myself, but I’ve come a long way.

And, if you need help in this area, you can heal this too!

Just know that you are special and wonderful just as your unique self, and you don’t have to feel bad about who you are, hide who you are, or settle for less than you deserve.

You are awesome! Look at you, bravely reading this blog post to help or improve yourself and your life. Some would never do it.

It takes guts to do the inner work that can be difficult but that is so worth it because it can change your life and bring you true peace and happiness.

So continue believing in yourself and in possibilities, and make choices that show you’re knowing your value and respecting yourself!

Closing thoughts: Does your past define you & affect your future (Don’t let it)

I hope this post on not letting your past define you was helpful and inspirational.

In this “does your past define you” post, I got you to think about & ask questions like:

  • Does your past define you?
  • Does your past have to affect your future?
  • Do you show that you respect and value yourself?
  • How can being present each day help you?
  • What will bring you peace and happiness?
  • Do you believe in yourself?

And, I hope getting you to think about these things helps you find and create a life that you love.

As I said above, make sure you’re always believing in yourself and knowing your value. This will make all the difference in your life! And…

Enjoy your self growth journey. Who you become in the process, how you grow, is what matters. So, take it one step at a time and one day at a time.

Be proud of yourself and treat yourself kindly along the way.

And, if you need more support click the “forum” link at the top of this page to join in our women’s forum group where women can feel safe to talk and support one another.

Good luck, and may you feel divine love and support!

Additional resources

If you liked this blog post called “Does your past define you & affect your future”, then I believe you’ll also like my post called 9 Self Growth Tips that Changed My Life (& can yours). In it I share real things that have helped me in life, so they’re tips that you can actually put to use. If they could help me they can help you, so click its title to start reading!

And, here is an online Avon shop with some of my favorite products!

If you’d like to support the mission of Abundant Life & Balance to spread positivity, or say thanks through a donation that’ll buy a coffee, you can send it through PayPal at: paypal.me/abundantspirit

Thanks!

Categories: Self Growth

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